WATCH: Stephen Colbert Is Your New Office Lunch Mate

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert starts on September 8

We’re closing in on the fall start date of the new incarnation of The Late Show, and impending late-night king Stephen Colbert has been keeping busy. After shaving the Colbeard off and announcing Jon Batiste as his band leader, the former Colbert Report host took a stab at writing his own theme song, did some push-ups for the troops, and took over the hosting duties for a Michigan public access show. Now, to bond with his future viewers, Colbert has launched his “daily, week-long series Stephen Colbert has Stephen Colbert’s Daily Lunch with You Starring Stephen Colbert.”

Lunch with Stephen (for short) is a perfect way to have lunch with a friend while you still stare into the abyss of your computer screen and scarf down leftovers. Colbert has thoughtfully gifted the Internet with a week’s worth of small chit-chat, office drama, and excellent dietary choices.

We will be updating this post with each of them as they are revealed. Watch the videos below, all featuring a casual Colbert below. You gonna eat those chips?

MONDAY

“I’m trying to drop a few lbs before September 8 so I’m practicing portion control. I’m only eating small sounding foods.”

Meal: Little Caesar’s pizza, thin mints, baby back ribs

TUESDAY

“Switching up the diet today: eating local…only food out of the vending machine from down the hall.”

Meal: Snickers bar

WEDNESDAY

“Going low carb today. Gotta be fit and ready for the show, so it’s a Paleo diet for me!”

Meal: gorilla hand sandwich

THURSDAY

“I’m still dieting. Only liquids… Oh, sweet darkness, cover me.”

Meal: Booze from a paper bag within his paper lunch sack.

FRIDAY

“Hey! Thank god it’s TGIF Friday right? Man, it’s frosty out there!”

Meal: No meal, he was arrested by the Department of Fish and Wildlife.

Thank you for watching Lunch with Stephen.

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