John Mulaney Hates Scooters as Much as the Rest of Us

He’s been dissing them on Instagram.

Ah, electric scooters. Scourge of the streets. Everyone in urban areas hates them, probably because they are so dangerous; no riders wear helmets, and they zip and zoom into oncoming traffic unexpectedly, difficult for drivers to see and yield to. There have been multiple scooter deaths and many more injuries. Plus, at the end of a ride people just leave their scooters on the sidewalk, resulting in scores of discarded scoots all around cities. Sometimes they are stacked neatly; other times, they are rudely blocking the path of pedestrians and cars alike. 

Now, stand-up comedian John Mulaney has bravely come forward to express his hatred for Satan’s favorite method of transpo. Twitter user @nellanndee screenshotted some Instagram stories in which Mulaney rightfully called scooters an “unsafe and deeply lame addition to American cities.” 

Part of this dislike is personal; according to one of his Insta stories, a baby boomer (of course) in Washington D.C. almost ran over Mulaney’s precious French Bulldog Petunia. The absolute nerve. 

Let’s hope his stand can help make a difference and help get those motorized bastards banned henceforth. Justice for Petunia. 

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