Among the many (admittedly lesser) stresses of living in a major US city is the constant threat of funding for public transportation being cut by politicians pointing out that ridership is in decline—though they fail to admit that this is only because they’ve already begun cutting funding for public transportation. And while the indispensable utility of buses and trains is obviously their biggest draw, it should be noted that it’s a little awkward—not to mention expensive—to hop in a Lyft with the intention of traveling aimlessly and letting your emotions take hold of you in a fairly cold and anonymous public space.
While the new single from Olivia Barton sees the songwriter processing the loss of a friend, “White Knuckling” also feels like an ode to the availability of this space for processing heavy emotions. “Get off the train, wipe your face, let your fists hang down,” she sings on the track, documenting the familiar sensation of coming out the other end of an directionless, dissociative commute re-tethered to reality.
“I wrote it six years ago, living in Boston, and my mentor and close friend had just died from cancer,” she shares of the single. “She was honestly such a hardass. I loved that about her. I had this moment while I was riding the train nowhere for hours, totally glazed over, and finally thought, ‘Well, what would she say to me right now?’ And what came to mind was ‘Bitch, go home,’ but that didn’t sound very poetic.” Speaking to the dissociative sensation of the memory, she adds: “It still feels like someone else wrote [the song] for me.”
Stream the single below. You can pre-order This Is a Good Sign here.
